Search Related Info Here

Tuesday, April 1, 2008

8 Steps for Planning a Baby Shower

by Heather L. Clark

Think you can't plan a baby shower? Think again! The tips below will help you plan a fun, fabulous and memorable baby shower that will be greatly appreciated by the mom-to-be and enjoyed by one and all.

Are you planning a baby shower? Good for you! A baby shower is the perfect way to shower the mom-to-be with love and support and help her celebrate one of the most exciting times in her life. But if you've never planned a baby shower, you may not be sure where to start. Don't worry - you're not alone. Lots of other women have been in the same boat you're in, wondering just where to start. The advice below is designed to guide you through the steps involved in planning a successful baby shower.

Select the Date and Time

The baby shower is usually held about six weeks before the baby's due date. However, some mothers are electing to have the party after the baby is born, especially if they choose not to find out the baby's sex beforehand. Just be sure to allow yourself plenty of time for planning. Showers can be held on either weekends or during the week - there really is no hard and fast rule. Just try to make the time and day convenient for everyone including any out-of-town guests. As for the time, consider the needs of people who must travel to attend. Also be sure to keep in mind the mother-to-be's schedule (naps, doctor appointments, etc.).


Choose the Location

When choosing a location, make sure it is easy to get to and will accommodate the needs of the party. Oftentimes, baby showers are held at the home of the hostess (that would probably be YOU!). Try to get a rough idea of how many people will be attending before finalizing any details.


Set a Budget

If you're like most of us, you'll need to stick within a budget for the baby shower. Be realistic about what you can afford to spend - the mother-to-be doesn't want you to go into debt. You should budget for invitations, favors, food and drinks, game supplies and your gift for the baby.


Create a Guest List

The best way to compile the guest list is by simply asking the mother-to-be who she would like to attend the shower. If the baby shower is a surprise, work closely with the father-to-be to create a guest list. The guest list usually includes friends and family, but a few close co-workers may also be invited. Get address, phone numbers, and email addresses. Also decide if it will be a "girl's only" shower or a "couples" shower.


Choose a Theme

Baby showers are supposed to be fun - and yes, even a little silly. There are hundreds of delightful and fun baby shower themes to choose from - the sky's the limit. And honestly, sometimes "Baby" is the only theme you need! No matter what theme you choose, just remember this will be the baby's first party. Have fun with it!


Select Invitations

Invitations can range from a phone call to a printed invitation, but generally, fun invitations are sent out. If you've selected a particular theme, you may want the invitations to tie in to it. Remember to include all necessary contact information and baby registry information on the invitations.

Plan the Menu

Unless you're hosting a couples baby shower or a very formal baby shower, you're probably fine with serving a cake, mints, nuts and some drinks such as tea or punch. However, if the shower will fall during a mealtime, your guests may expect you to serve more substantial food. In that case, you can serve anything from sandwiches to a potluck type meal.

Decide on Games

Into each baby shower, a few games must fall. Seriously, these baby shower games, although sometimes quite silly, can be lots of fun and are actually expected. Just take a look at our Baby Shower Games, or throw a few of your own ideas into the mix. And don't forget the favors!

Using the steps above will help ensure the baby shower you're planning goes smoothly, but above all, remember to have fun with it as you honor the mother-to-be and her impending arrival.

About Author: Heather L. Clark is a Web writer and researcher.

Saturday, March 29, 2008

Childproofing Your Baby’s World

By Ann Douglas

It’s only natural to want to protect your baby from harm—to protect her from the inevitable bumps and bruises. The key to babyproofing your child’s world is to learn how to see your home through your child’s eyes. “It’s a matter of developing a safety sense—of constantly asking yourself, ‘What could happen in this situation, and what can I do to either prevent it from happening or minimize the injury?’” explains Valerie Lee, President of the Kitchener, Ontario, based Infant and Toddler Safety Association.

While it’s unrealistic to think that you can prevent every single accident from happening, there’s much you can do to make your baby’s world a safe and secure place. Here’s what you can do to eliminate the major hazards in a typical home:

Every room:

- Keep a set of emergency telephone numbers beside each telephone—not just your main telephone.

- Keep curtain and blind cords out of baby’s reach.

- Keep high chairs, cribs, and furniture away from windows, appliances, and other potential hazards.

- Keep children away from baseboards and portable heaters.

- Use plastic safety covers and cord locks on electrical outlets.

- Install babyproof latches on drawers and cupboard doors.

- Place window guards on all second-storey windows.

- Attach bookcases and tall dressers to the wall to prevent tipping and avoid placing heavy items on top.

- Keep a fire extinguisher near each exit to your home.

- Store lighters and matches out of your child’s reach and change the batteries in your smoke detector at least twice a year (whenever you move your clock forward or back).

- Store medications and cleaners in their original containers so that you’ll be able to identify which products your child has consumed in the event of a poisoning.

- Wipe up spills promptly and avoid area rugs, which can pose a tripping hazard.

- Avoid leaving your child and your pet alone in the same room.

- Keep your cat’s litter box in a part of the house that is off-limits to your child.

Halls and stairways:

- Hang a shelf near the front door so that Grandma can keep her purse (and her heart medication) out of your toddler’s reach while she’s visiting.

- Install wall-mounted baby gates at the top (and, if necessary, the bottom) of each set of stairs.

- Keep the stairs free of objects.

- Get rid of your drycleaning bags as soon as you bring your drycleaning into the house. Tie them in knots and toss them in the trash.

- Install door alarms on all exterior doors.

Nursery:

-Get rid of any crib that was manufactured before September 1986.

- Tighten the screws in your child’s crib and check to ensure that the sides of the crib are still firmly locked in place.

- Inspect your baby’s crib mattress to ensure that it’s still in good condition. Replace it immediately if it’s too soft, too worn, or it doesn’t fit the crib snugly.

- As soon as your child learns how to stand in her crib, drop the mattress to the lowest setting and remove any bumper pads and large toys.

- Put your child is fire-retardant sleepwear rather than regular clothing at bedtime.

- Check that the safety strap on your baby’s change table is still working properly, and get in the habit of using it whenever you’re changing her diaper.

Remove any drawstrings or cords from your child’s clothing in order to reduce the risk of strangulation.

- Keep the diaper pail out of reach of your child or purchase a model with a child-proof latch.

- Avoid baby products such as walkers which have been manufactured for the U.S. market. They may not meet Canadian safety standards.

- Place a decal on your child’s window to let firefighters know that there’s a child in that room. You can obtain such decals from any child safety supply store.

- Avoid using decorative plug covers in your baby’s room. They’ll only encourage her to touch the electrical outlets.

- Move rocking chairs and gliders to another part of the house as soon as your child becomes mobile. They can pinch fingers or otherwise injure a baby or toddler.

- Regularly inspect your baby’s pacifier for signs of deterioration. According to Health Canada, pacifiers should be changed at least every two months.

- Tie a small parts tester (a.k.a. “choke tube”) to your baby’s change table. That way, you’ll know where to find the tube whenever you want to test whether a particular toy contains parts that are small enough to pose a choking hazard. (If you’re away from home, you can use a toilet paper roll instead. It’s slightly larger than a choke tube, but it’s best to err on the side of caution anyway.)

Bedroom:

- Never leave a baby or toddler alone on your bed.

- Never place a baby on a water bed.

- Don’t allow a child under the age of six to sleep on the top bunk of a bunk bed. The risk of falls and/or suffocation is simply too great.

Bathroom:

- Check the temperature on your hot water heater. According to Safe Kids Canada, most water heaters are set at 60° C or higher rather than the 49°C that most safety experts recommend.

- Fill your child’s bath with a few inches of cold water and then add hot water until the bath has reached the appropriate temperature.

- Don’t rely on a bathtub seat to babysit your baby for you while she’s in the tub. The suction cups on the seat could suddenly release and your baby’s face could go under water.

- Use bath mats in the bathtub to reduce the risk of slipping.

- Lock all medications (including vitamins) in your medicine chest or—even better—store them in a small cash box or medium-sized fishing-tackle box that can be locked and then stashed on the top shelf of your bedroom closet.

- Keep mouthwash, shampoo, cosmetics, and other toiletries out of your child’s reach.

- Equip the toilet seat with a childproof latch.

Kitchen:

- Check that the base of your baby’s high chair is wide enough to be stable, and check that the chair’s safety harness is still functional.

- Use placemats rather than a tablecloth at your kitchen table.

- Don’t hold a baby or toddler when you’re eating or drinking anything hot.

- Keep stuffed animals and other flammable toys away from the cooking area.

- Turn pot handles toward the back of the stove and only cook on the back burners.

- Keep cords for kettles, toasters, and other electrical appliances out of the reach of children.

- Organize your kitchen cupboards so that the items that are of the greatest interest to your child (e.g. cookies!) are the farthest distance from the stove.

Keep knives, can openers, and other sharp items out of the reach of children.

- Learn which foods (e.g. whole grapes, hot dog wieners, carrot sticks) pose a choking risk to babies and toddlers, and either chop the foods into smaller pieces or avoid them until your child gets a little older.

- Be careful if you heat your baby’s food in the microwave. Stir the food thoroughly and check the temperature carefully before serving it to the baby.

- Keep household cleaners—including dishwasher detergent—out of reach of children.

Family/Living room

- Discard any broken toys that have developed sharp edges or that could present a choking hazard.

- Ensure that any toys that require batteries have child-safe battery compartments (e.g. ones that can only be opened with a screwdriver).

- Make sure that your toy box is safe. It should have a safety hinge to prevent the lid from closing too quickly and it should have ventilation holes to ensure that your child will be able to breathe if she happens to get trapped inside.

- Make sure that the mesh on your baby’s playpen is fine enough to prevent a button from catching—something that could pose a strangulation risk.

- Use a fireplace pad on your fireplace hearth and keep your child far away from the fireplace while it’s being used.

- Put your vacuum cleaner away when it’s not being used so that your child won’t accidentally hurt her fingers or toes with the beater bar.

- Position floor lamps so that they’re out of your child’s reach or pack them away entirely.

- Place table lamps towards the back of the table and wrap the cord around the table leg for added stability.

Laundry room:

- Store laundry products out of your baby or toddler’s reach.

- Never allow your child to play around the washer or dryer.

Basement:

- Store paint thinners and other harmful substances out of your child’s reach.

- Ensure that woodworking tools are kept in a locked room or cabinet.

Garage:

- Teach your child that the garage is off limits.

- Ensure that your garage door is equipped with a safety feature that will cause it to go back up if it comes into contact with a person or object.

- Store tools, pesticides, automotive parts, and other hazardous items out of your child’s reach.

- Check that your child’s car seat is installed properly in your vehicle.

Backyard:

- Keep the BBQ away from your child’s play area.

- Ensure that your pool area is properly fenced (the fence should be at least four feet high and should surround the entire pool) and that the gate on the fence is both self-closing and self-locking.

- Check that your child’s playground equipment is safe and well anchored. You can find a detailed playground safety checklist at the Safe Kids Canada web site.

- Empty your child’s wading pool whenever it’s not in use.

- Ensure that her sandbox has a lid to keep neighborhood cats out.

- Keep your child away from any poisonous plants or weeds that are growing in your hard.

Monday, March 17, 2008

DISCIPLINE VS. PUNISHMENT

by Jody Johnston Pawel, LSW, CFLE

Discipline is different from punishment because it teaches children to learn from their mistakes rather than making them suffer for them. In fact, imposing suffering actually shifts the focus from the lesson that needs to be learned to who is in control. As a result, punishment focuses on the parent being responsible for controlling a child's behavior, rather than the child controlling his/her own behavior, which is the focus of discipline.

In Positive Discipline, Jane Nelsen offers guidelines for using consequences, which she calls the Four R's of consequences. These four R's actually apply to all discipline techniques, not just natural and logical consequences. Whatever discipline technique you choose, make sure it meets the following four criteria:

  • Whenever possible, REVEAL the consequences of misbehavior ahead of time so children will know what to expect the next time they choose to misbehave.

    "If you want to ride your bike, you need to stay on the sidewalk or I'll know you've decided to put it in the garage."

    Notice how the responsibility for the behavior and its effect are on the child rather than the parent. Can you tell how different this sounds than if the parent said, "Don't go in the street or I'll take your bike away." First of all, this wording gives the child the idea to go in the street (See "Don't say Don't!" July 1993 T.I.P.S.) then challenges the child to test the rule by wording it like a power threat.


  • The discipline should be logically RELATED to the misbehavior. Sending a child to bed or restricting a child from TV has nothing to do with riding a bike in the street.

  • resent your comments in a RESPECTFUL manner that lets children know they have a choice about how they behave.

    "When I see you riding your bike in the street, I know you're not ready to ride it safely and need to put the bike away."

    Notice how different this sounds than, "That's it, get out of the street! I'm taking your bike away for the rest of the day! You could get killed out there!" When we speak to children in disrespectful ways, they respect us less and tend to talk back at us disrespectfully more often. We earn others' respect by showing respect to them first.
  • Provide a REASONABLE solution that will allow children an opportunity to correct the behavior while the lesson is fresh in their minds.

    "You can try to ride your bike again on the sidewalk after lunch."


    Notice that the time limit was a matter of hours, rather than days. Always make the time limit as minimal as possible, but long enough to emphasize the lesson. Also, notice that the correct behavior was presented as a choice. The parent is respectfully revealing the discipline again before giving the child another chance.

    Each time the child violates the rule, increase the time limit gradually. If you restrict children from a bike for a week the first time, they'll spend more time dwelling on their resentment than thinking about the lesson. If they make the same mistake again, they're likely to lose the bike for a month! Children need practice at being good -- and we need to be honest with ourselves and decide whether our goal is to teach positive behavior, to show who is in power, or to get revenge.

    If any one of the Four R's is missing from the discipline, it turns the technique into punishment, which has Four (new) Four R's: Resentment, Rebellion, Revenge, and Retreat (lying, learning to not get caught, running away). If your child reacts in any of these ways, review how you presented your discipline. Chances are, one of the Four R's of Discipline was missing. But don't worry, children always give us another chance to learn from our mistakes

Jody Johnston Pawel is a Licensed Social Worker, Certified Family Life Educator, second-generation parent educator, founder of The Family Network, and President of Parents Toolshop Consulting. She is the author of 100+ parent education resources, including her award-winning book, The Parent's Toolshop. For 25+ years, Jody has trained parents and family professionals through her dynamic workshops and interviews with the media worldwide, including Parents and Working Mother magazines, and the Ident-a-Kid television series. Jody currently serves as the online parenting expert for Cox Ohio Publishing’s mom-to-mom websites and also serves on the Advisory Board of the National Effective Parenting Initiative.